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Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003
Like every good season finale, there needed to be a few weeks of anticipation (read, a few weeks of me not updating at all). Of course, anyone paying remotely close attention or reading the Weblog already knows how this week's entry-episode will end.
This bachelorette of sorts was trying on four eligible bachelors at last writing. There was John, who finds every sunny day a good enough day to find some time to spend on his boat; Mike, who travels all over the state of Florida to officiate basketball games; Fran, who when he isn't busy working is always up for a silly Instant Messenger conversation about gettin' it on; and Jeff, in the U.S. Navy in Japan, who was late for the first two episodes but made his much welcomed, grand appearance by episode three.
John, as I suspected, and as he kind of figured out, really isn't for me. We'd met up for a movie and also had our "proper date," which was dinner at a local (to him) bar, followed by some karaoke singing, because he knew I was into that. He was real excited about the prospect of telling his younger sister that he was dating someone younger than she was. But he could sooner tell something wasn't clicking for me with him, and so we remain just friends. He never calls me (he's never called me!) and never e-mails me. It seems it's Instant Messenger or nothing. But he continues to invite me to call him if I ever want to hang out.
Mike and I finally had the chance to meet up at Hard Rock Cafe in Orlando. We had a fun lunch and I told him it'd be great to hang out again as friends, perhaps with a bunch of other friends...
Fran and I were supposed to have a lunch date too, but he forgot my phone number when he left his neck of the woods for mine and so no lunch. Needless to say, I just laughed at him on IM for saying he forgot my number, and he swears it's the truth. We finally had our first semi-serious conversation. He says he likes me, thinks I'm fun, but I outright told him my heart is in Japan. I wanted to know if we could just be friends, and he said he wanted more. Then he asked me if we can be f*ckbuddies instead! So much for serious conversations. After some additional back and forth about nothing much, he made some comment like, "You women are all alike." I have no idea if he was serious or kidding around as usual, but whatever.
And so that leaves Jeff, who, yes, does have my heart. Of course, say the voices, I haven't met him in person yet, and yeah, maybe that could change when I meet him, but I'm willing to put money on the fact that that won't be the case. I have a really good feeling about him and him and me, and he just makes me smile! I wouldn't be going to Japan if I felt little or thought lightly about him and me. And strangely, it didn't take too long for me to feel this way. I certainly wasn't expecting to. But I'm definitely not complaining. All I know is this: Jeff has ruined me for everyone else. (Or saved me from everyone else, depending on how you look at dating in general these days.) I know that I sometimes have trouble falling asleep at night because I'm usually too excited about the fact that he exists! I know that sometimes, when I wake up in the middle of the night, I can't fall back to sleep because it's too much fun to stay awake with my thoughts of him. I know that he's the first person on my mind when I wake up in the morning. I know that my daydreams distract me at work when I'm not too busy, and the big smile on my face 90% of the time has everything to do with him. I know that every time he calls me, which is often considering where he is, it totally makes my day or night or both. I know that most of my e-mail gets neglected because I jump right to his messages and carefully spend time writing him back. I know that I love directing my energy his way. I know that when I look at the clock, I will add 14 hours to the time so I can imagine him working or sleeping or wonder what he's up to. And I know that every once in a while, I get that "Oh God, what if he doesn't like me anymore" feeling when I haven't heard from him at all somewhere between 24 and 36 hours. (But who's counting?) Otherwise, and most of the time, I know that being optimistic about anything and everything suddenly comes so easily to me. I just want to go to Japan! I've written about what I've thought I wanted in a relationship with someone. Going to Japan doesn't sound all that crazy to me if I think I'm pretty sure that's where I'm going to find it. Him. He's just so sweet and wonderfully affectionate. He's said he could see me as becoming his best friend. Wow, what a concept, to be best friends with the person you're in love with! I think we want the same things out of a romantic relationship and we know that; all the other details will fall into place. We already talked about how we might spend Christmas this year! And we both seem pretty impatient about just being together already!
Of course, and as my luck would seem to have it (and really I'm very, very lucky to have found him at all!!), he'll be in Japan until 2004...the end of 2004...and that really stinks, but that gives me time to take care of such things like, oh, finalizing my divorce. Little things like that...
I told Joe about Jeff. He basically just told me to be careful and reminded me of a few ways (aka, means) to make Japan possible. He is giving me his tax return for one, because he technically owes me some for my "half" of the house. I hadn't been all that concerned about the money, really. He'd been worried about whether he could afford the house at all without me, and I haven't wanted him to feel that he has no choice but to sell it. He has since refinanced and seems to be doing really well; he also acknowledged the divorce finalization process. I am really glad Joe and I still talk the way we do. He remains a very good friend to me.
And so I guess that wraps up the non-dramatic (or at least suspenseless) conclusion of this bachelorette's venture into online dating. Hell, I highly recommend it to anyone remotely curious to find someone special. As Oprah said on some recent show of hers, chances are that Mr. (or Mrs.) Right isn't going to just show up at your front door one day--although one could always hope.
Meanwhile, it's too tempting to end this entry in true Bachelorette style:
Jeff, will you accept this rose? (I love you.)
Quote Of The Day:
"At first, dreams seem impossible, then improbable, and eventually inevitable."
--Christopher Reeves